I’m a wedding celebrant, so I mostly work with you on the part of your wedding that involves your ceremony. However, because couples usually book me around a year in advance, I get to know their wedding worries quite well. Either in their own words, or through the priorities of their wedding planner, certain wedding day worries bubble to the surface over and over again. Here’s my take on what’s worth the worry, what’s not, and what to put your energy into instead.
RAIN SPOILING YOUR OUTDOOR CEREMONY
It’s highly unlikely this will happen. In 100 ceremonies, it has never happened to me. This is because your venue and you will have a plan B for rain. If you’re getting married outdoors, the new issue is the sun and the heat. You should be planning for that instead. For you, your celebrant, and your guests, anything over 28 degrees is very, very uncomfortable without shade. Your photographer will also tell you that bright sunshine against cloudless skies makes glare an issue, and this season, I’ve seen cameras overheat and stop working during ceremonies. If you have classical musicians, their instruments cannot be outside in direct sunlight and they need shade. Put your energy into ensuring you are comfortable in heat, if you are planning an outdoor summer wedding ceremony.
DIY WEDDINGS AND WHO WILL HELP SET THINGS UP
Setting up is FUN. Before your wedding ceremony, loads of friends and family will be glad to help get things perfect for you. After the wedding, everybody will muck in to clear up. The bit you should put your worry or organisational energy into is what happens AFTER your ceremony. Because, by that point, everybody is ready to party. They’ve got drinks and food and people to talk to. But you still have chairs to stack, plates to lay out, photo groups to organise, and decorations to move. If you don’t want to be literally doing it yourself, make sure you plan for that mid-section bit. Take it from someone who had a DIY wedding and had people coming up to our table asking if they could have more food and where was the red wine. It sucks. This season I’ve cleared 100 chairs from a ceremony area because literally nobody else helped.
YOUR GUESTS NOT HAVING FUN
I asked my previous couples to tell me what their worries had been, and this came up a lot. It’s understandable. You’ve got lots of people you love, spending time with each other for the first time, and only two of you to entertain them. Or so you think. In reality, you invited most of them because they are fun, and they will most likely enjoy themselves. And if they aren’t enjoying themselves, they might leave early. Either way, you won’t notice. You’ll be busy having fun with the fun people. Pour your energy into the fun people – the funnest of which, of course, will be you and your new spouse.
YOUR CEREMONY BEING BORING
Arrange a call with me. We can purge that one right away. You could easily waste money and energy on having a really boring ceremony, that not even you will remember, so, I really would look around for a wedding celebrant like me who can help you avoid that worry.
everything not being perfect on your wedding day
Sit down now, write an imaginary Tripadvisor review of your wedding by you and your partner. Don’t overthink it too much but be specific and use adjectives. Use that as a guide for what your heart really wants.
“My friends spent hours on the garden games” or “I loved seeing my mum dance off to ABBA with my husband” or “we both cried during our vows”.
If you write the movie script, everybody else gets to be in it. If you don’t, they are ad-libbing and you might not like what they say. The power of perfection is both in your hands, and fully definable by you both.
